The idea for this entry sprouted from thoughts on total healing (mind/body/spirit) left in the post-Abdominal Myomectomy forum. I thank the ladies there, particularly Sunday and Gab. This is a fascinating topic as I’ve always felt that to have total health, the mind, body, and spirit must work together. I’ll start with my experience and then open the floor to others.
My body, mind, and spirit became disjointed years ago. I decided to seek medical assistance because my periods were becoming bad and blamed fibroids. There are women in my family who had surgery for fibroids and I just knew it was my turn. Yeah, too bad the first ultrasound didn’t detect the dang things. Had a heck of a time trying to convince the doctor and grew tired of doing so. Ended up dealing with my symptoms on my own (with mind fighting body) for YEARS…
Of course, the symptoms worsened and after passing enormous clots, I thought I should seek medical assistance yet again. Got another ultrasound and (surprise, surprise) fibroids were detected. I was so angry from being right that, once again, I walked away even though my new doctor was really trying to help. Oh, I’m pretty crazy at times. (Didn’t you know that already?)
Finally, my body got literally tired (severe anemia) of listening to my stubborn mind and I found myself back in my doctor’s office forced to do something about my fibroids. I knew I needed treatment but mind and body were still fighting in the MRI scanner (mind wanted out, body wanted to stay in). Spirit had enough of the shenanigans and put an end to it right then and there. After that, the three coexisted peacefully all through the 3 months of Lupron injections, my Hysteroscopic Myomectomy, and the UFE.
Now several months later, they still are working together in a balanced partnership. I’m on my blog quite a bit these days but I manage to take time and meditate, pray, read, fellowship with others, laugh, cry (mostly happy tears but others as well), do the “happy” dance around the house, enjoy art and music in addition to tons of science, GO OUTSIDE of my house for extended periods of time, exercise (not as much as I should), eat healthier, and a list of other things I’m sure I’ll mention down the road. It is well with my mind, body, and spirit.
Tell me how you are healing physically, mentally, and spiritually.
——————–
Related Post:
What makes you mad, sad, or glad when you think about your fibroids?
inquisitive geek with fibroid tumors ™ blog 
April 14, 2007 at 8:30 pm
Hi Peace,
Does this mean that we have to be unfulfilled to be motivated? Do we all become cow-like if all of our needs are met, if we are happy? I’m not sure this is so. I think that if I achieve something at one level, well, there’s the next level (whatever that mey be) to explore and perhaps conquer or achieve. It’s all about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: we can’t even entertain the thought of getting a diamond necklace if we can’t buy enough food etc. As soon as we achieve one state of being, we want to learn more and move on. I think it’s human nature to forge ahead. And on the subject of happiness, that is such an elusive thing that happens at different levels and in bursts for me. I would say that I am happy in most areas of my life, but it is’nt all perfect. How can I compartmentalise happiness? There are moments of pure happiness too aren’t there, when all is right with the world and everything falls into place.
I think motivation may be tied up in an attempt to achieve more or to aspire to what is just out of our reach. Can we accept imperfections, be generally happy and still hold onto our motivation? I think so, because I don’t think anyone can ever be totally fulfilled in every area of their lives.
I don’t know if this has made any sense, I’m not sure if I have contradicted myself, but it makes sense as I write it, so I’ll post it.
Sunday.
April 15, 2007 at 10:51 am
I have been away too long, i am trying to catch up.
This is also my favorite thread, partially because it seems to fit with my life right now and what is going on around me.
Jess, dont second guess, u r intelligent enough to know that you made the right decision and why you made that decision. It is only natural to second guess, i have done so myself but deep down in my soul i know i did the right thing and only time will tell of the ultimate result.
Sunday, somehow i understood every word you said! scary.
we all have imperfections, but that doesnt mean we cannot be happy with them. Again if this AM has done anything for me at all, its definately been my soul, it has opened up so much more within myself.
but i am still searching………got so much more to learn, to feel, to give, to get, to everything……………so much more.
G
April 16, 2007 at 1:08 am
Hmm I think I have been away for too long also. So many posts to catch up on at other forums, and new people.
Hey Sunday I think Persephone or is that Persepone college or something like that where my therapist studied, maybe they could give you some practitioners. Or just a local steiner web site. for the moment I have forgotten what the therapy is called, I don’t want to say phsycho therapy as it sounds a bit physcho, but it must be phsycho something, not phsychodarama.
Jess it is ok to go with your intuition about your body, no one knows it as well as you do. it was my intuition which made me look for and discover that you could even have a myomectomy instead of a complete hysterectomy.
YOU did what your body and soul told you to do.
Doctor friends, are friends who happen to be doctors, not specialists, and his ego is irrelevant to your personal well being
April 18, 2007 at 4:44 pm
Hi All,
Have been posting on the post-op#4 thread since this time last week (woo-hoo to the “other side”), but have been reading along here too & wanted to thank you all for such honest & compelling reflections.
Jess: I also wanted to echo what the ladies have already said. Sadly, the dr.’s behavior seems indicative of a major segment of the medical community. (The NYTimes has an article today about how hard it is for younger docs to get through to their superiors in the hospital heirarchy…& with some lethal consequences). In the same way you wouldn’t turn to anyone but yourself to make the final decision on a job, home, large purchase, or relationship, so goes for all things health related…perhaps most pointedly when the health matter is gynecological. You have shown great strength & have been a great source of comfort & courage for many of us around here…such is the strength of this site (*props to EG!*)…I hope even a day’s distance finds that wild-card comment fading.
On a not-totally-related note: you are in NYC too, no? Can I ask how long it was before you felt up to really hoofing it around town? Or before you felt ready for the subway again? Eight days out I’m able to go only pretty short distances, say 5-10 blocks (taken*slowly*) before wanting to turn around (unless I can sit after the first leg & rest, like at the dog park).
Sorry for so much prose!
SB
April 21, 2007 at 2:28 am
Thanks fifi, Persephone college, eh? Like the name.
Hey, Same Boat, welcome to this thread.
It’s true for me too, Gemma, I think that this is one of my favorite threads. I have been reading and sometimes contributing on the abmyo4 thread, but it moves so quickly, I’m losing track a bit. Will have a thorough read when time permits.
Sunday.
April 22, 2007 at 1:25 pm
Let me just say that you guys are amazing. I am so comforted by reading your posts about the situation with my doctor friend. It’s funny…the day I heard from him I was really upset..and I thought “I need to post this and see what the girls think”…and now I don’t worry about it anymore thanks to you all. So thanks again. You are all so empowered and empowering.
Same Boat…yes I’m in NYC too. I spent the first 2 1/2 weeks in NJ at my parents’ house and took walks that were maybe equivalent to 5-10 blocks. I had my 2 week follow up in nyc…and I had to do a lot of walking that day…and I took the subway and IT WAS ROUGH. I immediately went home and slept for hours. I returned to work full time, including subway riding, at exactly 3 weeks post op, but that week was HARD…I wish I had waited until 4 weeks.
Thanks again wonderful ladies
Jess
April 27, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Jess: Thanks for the detailed reply! I have been walking lots but almost no subways yet (taken a few cabs, not usual for me, & hence feeling lame for it). Had my post-op check-in wed & got the all clear for starting exercise again, in moderation, & was told that all looks a-ok.
My dilemma is this: I work at home (or on the road, or sometimes at a shared office) because I work for myself. While I’d already decided to cut down on freelance gigs til summer’s end, I had sort of *promised myself* that I’d be back at my book project as soon as I felt up to it and, because my recovery has been so smooth & easy (all i hear from everyone is how amazed they are at how fast & low-key my recovery symptoms progressed) that I am now already angry at myself for having “wasted” this week (week #3 starting tuesday).
While I did get head to my outside workspace Tuesday, it was mainly to straighten up, & though I have been taking on a lot of daily errands for stuff that needed doing around the house (stuff for the home work station included), I have felt really really tired the past few days & have not worked at all…though I don’t know if this is real exhaustion or tired that comes from a downturn in mood…
Has anyone else felt frustrated/depressed/angry at themselves for not getting back into the groove faster when all looks well on the outside (i.e.: swelling way way down, tummy nearly back to normal)? I know from reading everyone else that 2-3 weeks *isn’t* much time…& i know that my creative juices don’t flow well when i’m low energy…but with my dr.giving the ok for even situps & arm weights in gentle moderation i’m feeling like a slug trying to coast on the operation for time excuses…
Any other freelancers in post-op?
Feeling a wee bit desperate here…
SB
April 27, 2007 at 8:55 pm
Same Boat, I get the frustration/anger/depression about not getting back into the groove faster. I still experience it now at 3 months post-op. We need to stop beating ourselves up and to be more patient with ourselves. I’m patient with others, why not myself??
All I can say about you returning to work and exercising at 2-3 weeks post-op is that it sounds like a lot, to me anyway. As I wrote, I went back to work at 3 weeks…and I thought “I’m recovering well, no real pain anymore, things are going so smoothly, I SHOULD be going back to work” but, looking back now, I wish I had taken at least one more week. I have struggled to get back to exercising consistently, and while I do work out more regularly now, I just still can’t quite be as consistent as I used to. Not yet. (By the way, please be careful about doing exercises too soon…my doctor insisted NOTHING BUT WALKING until 6 weeks post-op, and I have heard the same thing from many of the women here. There is just no good reason to strain your body while it is in the midst of healing itself. Just my two cents.)
Many of us on this board push ourselves too hard. We don’t take enough time to smell the roses, or to allow our bodies the time they need to heal.
Ok I’m getting off my soapbox…sorry to be so preachy.
Jess
May 1, 2007 at 5:45 pm
Jess:
I so appreciate your taking the time to offer up such a thoughtful response…& I don’t find it preachy in the least (or if it is, I’m guilty of the same from time to time).
The cyclical beating-up-on-oneself–not treating ourselves with the same care & respect we bestowe on others–seems so common a trap for our fair sex, but you help to underscore the importance of *keeping up the habit of keeping the habit it in check*.
Gratefully,
SB
May 2, 2007 at 10:21 am
Hi Same Boat,
Rather than getting frustrated at myself for not getting back into the groove quicker, I was really questioning the reasons why some posters felt it necessary to return so quickly to routine, when I saw this healing time as a bit of a gift. During this healing time I found I could think clearly and contemplate things (big picture stuff), at relative length. I found that the more time I had, the more time I felt I needed in order to find or re-discover what I truely wanted from my life. It’s funny, but I also felt a bit guilty that I was enjoying my time off so much; I thought that perhaps I should be desperate to be doing abdominal crunches and working long days too. I just didn’t. This time out has caused real frustration for me because the answers have not emerged yet and I am actually back into my groove, working long hours, not doing abdominal crunches and generally getting on with life. I have mentioned my happy family life, which contrasts with my questions regarding my working life.
At the risk of being convoluted, I reckon that you should just play the whole thing by ear and listen to your body and don’t expect too much too soon.
Sunday.
May 3, 2007 at 7:24 pm
I have a huge fibroid that has been in residence for close to 15 years, it is huge and I just decided to live with it, because I didn’t trust the surgeons. I was lucky in that it didn’t cause pain, just a lot of bleeding and cramping for 8 days every month. What I wish someone had told me was that this is totally unneccesary. The problem, for me, was the interaction of the period with the tumor, get rid of the period, no more symptoms. There are some birth control pills out there that will eliminate periods, but so will depo provera shots, and that is what I chose. The advantage of depo is that it doesn’t have the estrogen, so you are not feeding your fibroid, the way you are with BC pills. Hope this helps a few people.
July 26, 2007 at 6:44 am
Hi all,
well this thread is a tad slow!! I guess my life is significantly different now that I am months post op. My periods are so much more managable and I am less stressed about my periods too and that is a huge relief. I must say however; that my life is so busy and I am often tired and living in the moment, so much so that I have little time to reflect as I did during my time off work whilst in recovery. I miss that time and it still plays very much on my mind. I do feel disatisfied and yet have no time to make significant changes. But we have made some small changes to our lives and my family are benefitting from these changes. Let my tell you what we have decided to do. My husband and I both work long hours and we have three young children. Previously we struggled with doing everything for ourselves. We found that when we weren’t working, we were cleaning or doing laundry and not being with our children. We felt like we were missing out, we felt guilty and we felt that this was not the life we wanted. We decided that it was keeping abreast of the laundry that was driving us crazy. So now we are getting our laundry done for a while so that we can have some time to actually have a life. Then we decided that we had too much junk that was of sentimental value and too hard to get rid of, so we have taken a storage unit for a short time too, so we can clear our heads of our ‘stuff’.
I know these are small things and for us they are costly things. But we are getting some head space and I feel it’s all due to my time in recovery after the abmyo.
Now I want to do more to glean more time and the next thing is to, again, reevaluate my high stress job.
Boy what an essay!!! Can anyone relate??
Sunday.
September 2, 2007 at 7:20 am
Hi all,
This little thread feels a bit like my own personal diary!! I’m the ‘Omega man’!! HA! Well, I still feel that this is a really valid discussion about time, life, body and mind and I’m still grappling with it all. I don’t have any answers yet, and I don’t have a lot of spare time to find them. Ohh for a tropical island and a few months to navel gaze. But being at work and a mum, I guess I will have to have my epiphany at a pre-scheduled, convenient and pragmatic time! If only I knew how to generate the aforementioned epiphany. Is there a catalogue? Can I buy one on ebay; now that would be convenient. Well for now, I’ll have to keep hectic. Thank you God for my family!!
Sunday.
September 8, 2007 at 6:38 am
Jess, Gab, are you out there?? I hope you are well and happy. Please check in and let me know how you are. Have things settled for you; is your life running smoothly?
Sunday.
July 4, 2008 at 11:42 pm
PLEASE HELP… I HAD AN AM IN DECEMBER AND I THINK THE FIBROIDS ARE GROWING BACK, SO I WENT TO MY DOCTOR AND HE SAID HE FEELS SOMETHING BUT TO PUT MY MIND AT EASE ORDER A PELVIC US… HAS ANYONE ELSE GREW BACK SO QUICKLY… SHOULD I WORRY
June 3, 2010 at 3:00 am
The vast majority of fibroids grow as a woman gets older, and tend to shrink after menopause. The location of the fibroids plays a strong influence on how to approach them..Often heavy bleeding can be decreased with birth control pills.There are a number of medications in the family of GnRH agonists, which induce a temporary chemical menopause.Mifepristone, better know as the ‘French abortion pill, or RU-486, also may cause a decrease in size of myomas, and often stops abnormal uterine bleeding. It also has undesirable side effects. It’s use is promising, but it is not currently available in the United States. This is also called myomectomy. Myomectomy, with one exception, means making an incision into the uterus and removing one or more fibroids.